Does your toddler have temper tantrums?
Obviously, the answer is either:
“yes, all the time” or “yes, some of the time” right?
If you’re like me, I’ve faced tantrums with my kids and reacted in ways I’m not proud of. And I always swear that I’m going to figure out a better way to handle tantrum situations in the future. But, really... I kind of forget about it…. until the next tantrum.
That’s why I wanted to chat with certified parenting coach, Brittany Podsobinski, founder of BPODS Parenting.
There are SO many ah-ha moments in this interview but MY biggest takeaway was that MY reaction to my kid’s tantrum is not at all unlike the tantrum itself! Once again, reminding me to look at my kid’s behavior… and then look in the mirror! ha!
Brittany explains what is happening in the brain when kids (*ahem* or parents) have tantrums.
I learned the concept that all behavior is communication which is why kids sometimes flip their lids. And, most of the time, those lid-flipping moments are caused by an unmet need in the child.
If we can be a little more intentional as parents and try and meet our kiddo’s unmet needs, we can prevent the tantrums.
So, if there is a time of day or particular event that always seems to be met with resistance and frustration from your kiddo - take a step back and see what the unmet need might be. There are 8 common unmet needs that can cause toddler tantrums: unconditional love, connection, attention, empathy, affection, appreciation, growth and independence. Brittany goes into some great examples in the video.
Even with the best of intentions, temper tantrums are still going to happen.
Brittany shows us some ways to handle them… and why it’s so important that we, the parent, stay calm.
She reminds us that we need to remember that all feelings are allowed but all behaviors are not and how asking questions can actually hold off toddler tantrums.
She introduces a great concept of “play can save the day” - how using silliness and playfulness can help to prevent tantrums and redirect the emotion to laughter.
We even talk about some great ideas to hurry your kids to bed and make teeth brushing less of a drag!
I’ve had folks in my Facebook community already commenting about how these tools have helped to transform the way they parent and help them reduce tantrums - because they know what to look for, so they can stop them before they start!
She gives us tools and suggestions for how to react in better, more patient, positive and respectful ways. And don’t we all want to feel more confident and be able to parent this way?